In the meantime, enjoy some pictures! Maybe even play a little game called Guess How Many Logo Revisions I’ve Had. These are from some of my latest shoots. Sweet babies, sweet babies on the way, and some of my sweet friends and family.

I’ll be back soon, I promise.

xoxo

Grits

Not really an echo here.  More like a giant piece of advice for the five hour trip with five people who are related in the car:  Goat Houses are not meant to entertain the driver.  (If you’re driving the car and someone points out the goat houses on the side of the road, you are NOT ALLOWED to look.  If you do, and the car begins to drive in the direction of the goat houses just because you are looking that way you will get hit in the back of the head.  Also, no one else in the car is allowed to mention how insanely cool the goat houses were for the remainder of the trip.)

On with the echoes:

“Dude.  Every time you snore, you fart.”

“I’ve wrecked the most cars. Why am I driving?”  ”That’s how bad we don’t want to drive.”

“Rohto’s are delicious in my eyes.”  ”Is that like saying a suppository is delicious in your butt?”

“Did that sign say ‘Hopefully Cairo’?” “Yes, hopefully Cairo is this way.”

“Y’all slept with a lizard.”

“Dude, you’re bleeding.”  ”Yeah, the lizard bit me when I stuck him in my nose.”

“We’re going to the gas station.”  ”Have you been there before?”  ”No.”  ”You need more people.”

“Does he have his v-neck undie tucked in his boxers?” “Yeah, so his crack doesn’t show.”

“Where’d you go?”  ”On a tour of the house.”  ”It’s a circle with three shitters in the middle. There’s your tour.”

“There’s a silk poinsettia and glitter yarn on that fly swatter.”  ”It’s to kill festive flies.”  ”Naw. It’s up there all year.”

“I’m going to Wal-Mart.”  ”Me too.”  ”I’m not.”  ”Why not? Have you ever been to the Cairo Wal-Mart?”  ”No.”  ”Dude. Get in the car.”

“Holy shit.  A camouflage polo.  I told you this place was the best.”

“Does he know that he’s in the swishy pants club yet?”

“She said to take a left, then a left, then another left.  That’s a fucking circle.”  ”Yeah, I’m staying here. See ya when ya get back from your circle.”

“Why are the dogs freaking out?”  ”Driveway alarm is going off”  ”Who’s here?”  ”No one.  Your brother is backing up and down the driveway to make the alarm go off.”

“Daddy, I’ve already pointed the pistol at them but they won’t stop barking.”  ”Which pistol?”  ”This one.”  ”Naw, they aren’t scared of that one.  Use this one.”

“I’m not eating that.”  ”Why?”  ”Because it may be opossum.”  ”Dude, it’s pork.”  ”How do you know opossum isn’t the other other white meat?”

1.  I bought a house.

2.  I got engaged.

3.  I got married. (and I go to the bank now and deposit a quarter in my account just so I can hear someone call me Mrs. Thomas)

4.  I now have TWO adorable babies ages 4 and 5.

5.  Damn. I wish I could think of something big for number five.  Oh! I’ve got it! My little brother and his fabulous wife are expecting their first baby!

Wait, that last one doesn’t have bull to do with me. Except that I’m whistling Dixie excited about this, y’all.  He’s one of “those” people who has all the answers about how to be a parent even though he’s never done it before.  Don’t get me wrong, I can’t wait to meet that precious baby and love on her and give her obnoxious toys and make her the rottenest thing you’ve ever met.  I’m just looking forward to being at the Christmas table when she (I want him to have a girl, can you tell?) throws a little sass his way.  Or when one of her big, bad, mean ol’ cousins teases her and he wants to come after them like an offensive lineman in a championship game.  Oh, he’s got all the advice, y’all.  I’ve heard, “If she were mine I’d….” more times than I can shake a stick at. We’ve actually had fights about it.  Not fist fights.  Well, not recently.  Anyway, I’m just excited.   I’m looking forward to the chuckle I’ll get.  Bless his heart. This is going to be fun.

I think I need to expand a little bit more on number three.  I really feel like number three deserves it’s own post though.  I just have to have some time to think about how to articulate that.  I married my best friend, y’all.  After almost 20 years.  THAT’S A BIG FREAKING DEAL.  He knows my ups, my downs, my ins, my outs, my whatmakesmeticks and he knows AND loves my family and he still signed up.  Holy shit.  This is big stuff and it so needs it’s own post.  So I’m going to shut up about it.  For now.  Just for now.

I don’t want to make anymore broken promises about more frequent posts so I won’t.  I just know that I miss y’all – big time.  I miss writing.  I miss telling my story.  I’ll be back, y’all.  If only to humiliate my children and my new husband, I’ll be back.  I (fingers crossed) promise.

xoxo

ash

I present to you the almost-one-year-old Strawberry Shortcake and her big brother.

I barely started to dig through the shots when I decided I simply MUST share these with their oh-so-sweet and patient Mama…

• No ifs, ands or butts about it.  (What the hell does that actually mean?)
• You’re cruisin’ for a bruisin’. (Really?)
• If you’re gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough. (Okay, I kind of liked saying that one.)
• Stop it or I’ll give you a reason to cry. (Yes, because I’d love to hear more incessant, needless crying.)
• Go to your room and think about what you did. (Why? So you’ll want to do it again?)
• I don’t buy your clothes so your friends will like them. (Oh, yeah. Like we don’t ALL buy our clothes for other people’s opinions.)
• I don’t care what <insert friend name> does. I care what you do.  (There’s 974 reasons to hate this one.)
• How many times have I asked you not to do that? (I don’t know. I wasn’t counting either.)

There is one left that I’m itching to use though.  If my Daddy and his siblings ever brought home less than satisfactory marks in conduct my grandmother’s response would be:  ”You can’t help it if you’re stupid, but you can keep your mouth shut.”  Oh, please let me have a chance to say this!!!!

My precious little un-biological niece was baptized this Sunday.  What a wonderful sight to behold!

I snapped a very moving shot of the family in prayer over her during the baptism but I’m not allowed to post it due to my inability to perform plastic surgery with my mighty mouse.  Thus, you will have to make do with these wonderfully squishy cheeks.  I managed to catch minute bits of the sermon, because who can pay attention with this little nugget grinning at you the ENTIRE TIME?!

Once again, I have to say thank you to my un-biological sister for giving me the opportunity to be a part of these most precious moments.  23 years of BFF’ness and counting!

I don’t want y’all to think for one second that I haven’t found things to write about… because I AM the mother of a four-year-old with a non-stop brain and a mouth to prove it.  I’ve also been waking up with the chickens to work out lately.  Not that I actually HAVE any chickens within spitting distance of me but I’ve been waking up the same time as SOMEONE’s chickens.  Yes, I actually started to exercise.  It sure is a kick in the butt when you loan your best friend your “skinny pants” for her to use as makeshift maternity pants.  (That P-90 x is a friggin’ kick in the butt too, by the way.)

My daughter usually sleeps through the first half of my workout, but wakes up while I’m “cooling down” on the elliptical.  This is when I put my foot down about the television.  6:30 am is MY t.v. time (dammit).  Fox and Friends are my workout buds and Little Miss Sponge listens to them and, unfortunately, me and my sidebar comments during that time.  Here’s a recent recap of a conversation we had during such time:

EJ:  Mama, is Jesus the President of Heaven?

Me:  Well, yes, Baby, I guess you could say that.

EJ:  I think he should be the President of the United Stakes too.  (yes, Stakes)

Me:  I bet a lot of people think that, Sweet Pea.  That’s a very smart thing for you to say.

EJ:  Everyone in my Pre-K class is smarter than Barack Obama aren’t they, Mama?